I really liked reading the article How to Give Feedback Without Sounding Like a Jerk by Adam Grant because it gave tips on a more practical ways to give feedback without beating around the bush with unnecessary praise. No one likes being a "feedback sandwhich", where the meat of the criticism is given in between two slices of praise. Instead, there needs to be equal communication, and Grant identifies the ways to do his are: expalin why you're giving feedback, take yourself off the pedestal, ask if the person wants feedback, and having a transparent not manipulative dialogue. This is great, especially for college kids. I think too often we are overly considerate of the other person's feelings, which can come across putting their emotions over their intelligence. Being deliberate about feedback and letting the person know it comes from a place of support, not criticism, is most effective in delivering ways to improve.
The second article I read came from Parents magazine back in 2000. Alfie Khon's article, Five Reasons to stop saying Good Job is something that I think will really help me with a new job I started this week. I take care of elementary aged students for three hours after school each day, and I'm always looking for ways to connect with them but also help improve their learning. Khon explains how overusing "good job" not only manipulates children, but creates a generation of "praise junkies". Not only that, it makes children lose interest and reduces their achievement level. Praise should be given where it is deserved and encouragement should be given otherwise. No one benefits from being over-praised, this issue is something that I have discuess in my social psychology class this semester as well. While it may be especially hard to withhold praise as a parent, I believe it benefits the kid if they are raised with the intention to always improve, only hearing a "good job" when they truly did something that earned it.
Feedback cat; source: Growth Mindset
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