Hello! First of all, I hope you are having an amazing day so far. If not, please first enjoy this picture of my first hedgehog, Mochi, in a tiny santa hat. Personal Photo: my first hedgehog's first Christmas! It might be an unusual choice of pet, but it is one that I highly recommend for students. I am a senior, graduating in May with a degree in Chemistry&Biochemistry and a minor in Pre-Health Social Sciences. These past four years have been very time consuming, and I wanted a pet that would accomodate my schedule. Enter: hedgehogs. They are solitary, nocturnal, small, don't require a lot of resources or space, perfect! And once I got my first, I became hooked on other exotic animals as well. I hope to one day have a large assorment of interesting critters and reptiles! Aside from loving my hogs, I try to spend my extra time travelling all over the world. Both my parents immigrated from Asia, and we frequently travel back to visit my extended family. I hav
Hi Moriah,
ReplyDeleteI am so glad that I had a chance to read through your storybook project website. You are off to a wonderful start. In my opinion, one of the clear strengths of your website is the ability to draw your reader’s attention and maintain it throughout. I love the image that you chose for your banner on the first page. The little hedgehog is so cute. I love that you are telling stories from the viewpoint of a hedgehog. That is truly unique. I do not think I have seen another project page quite like that. You do such a wonderful job in your introduction in setting the scene for the reader. I was really able to put myself in the shoes of the hedgehog ( or little paws I guess). You really had me wanting to read more, and I cannot wait to see how these stories unfold in the future.
-Andy
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ReplyDeleteHey, Moriah!
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your introduction and the adorable pictures of hedgehogs that you used, especially the one in the tent--how did you find such a perfect photo for your project? Too cute! One small thing I noticed is in the first part, what appears to be the author's note, you say "each inspired by fable that I read" but I think it should be "each inspired by a fable I read"--just a really tiny little thing! The rest was amazing and I am super excited to read about where Egan goes and what all he sees! I also really enjoyed the fun (or not so fun!) facts about hedgehogs--who would think that such adorable creatures could behave this way! Too funny! I think it would be cool if you continue sprinkling in little facts about hedgehogs, especially since most people (myself included) do not really know that much about them! I think it is really cute that you chose to write a storybook about the little creatures you have as pets--this will make your storytelling more personal and engaging!
Hi Moriah,
ReplyDeleteTo start off, that is an adorable picture you have of Azuki here on your Comment Wall. I also love the fact that in the banner image of your introduction, Azuki has a little tent. More into the style of your storybook, I think the presentation of your storybook could really be strengthened by how the elements of your page are organized. What initially stuck out to me on your Introduction page was how separated your different text boxes looked. The odd, almost random, lines between text boxes and the wide space between your text and footer messages throw off the overall look of your page. I think you could really unify your page by making the background color all the same color or something similar to that. Past that, I am really excited to read about Egan and his journey! I am sure he will find that there is a lot of adventure out there waiting for him!
Hi Moriah!
ReplyDeleteI remember reading your initial introduction on your blog and being so excited to see more stories of your sweet hedgehogs! I really love your plan about having the stories be told through the eyes of the hedgehogs. Such a unique idea and a concept that could be both incredibly cute and very intriguing. I like that you also decided to incorporate Greek name as the "eyes" for your story. This is a great way to mix mythological tales with a new, fun idea of "hedgehog storytelling". Your website is looking great but I do think you might be able to add a few more things to spice it up. I think it might be a good idea to add some pictures or additional visuals on your homepage in order to engage the viewers and give them something interesting and entertaining to look at. This might also be something you choose to include on your introduction and future story pages as well. Good start and can't wait to read your stories!
Hey Moriah!
ReplyDeleteI think the idea of telling stories from the viewpoint of a cute little hedgehog that is brand new to the world will surely result in amusing anecdotes and perhaps some humorous perspectives of an otherwise average situation. I assume you might write light hearted, Disney like stories with lots of animal characters with a slight Greek mythological twist. If that is the angle you plan on taking, I am positive your storybook will be well worth a read. I liked reading your introduction because I learned a little bit about hedgehogs. Given their inherent adorableness, I had no idea they could be so ruthless. And I think its great that your subject was inspired by your own hedgehog. I am sure that will make for great material that will be fun to read because it is personal for you. I will certainly be back to your site to read the creative and artful stories that are sure to come.
Hi Moriah!
ReplyDeleteFirst off I love the inspiration behind your story! I think you will really have an advantage being that your inspiration comes from your own quill children! I also really like the stories you have used as inspiration to tell yours tory of the Brave Hedgehog.
I laughed out loud at your first sentence, “What other animal has familial relationships as complex as those in Greek mythology than hedgehogs?” I had no idea how hedgehogs interacted with one another, and was very shocked to hear they sometimes eat their newborns! So sad!
I learned so much about hedgehogs from your introduction alone. They are more than just cute little creatures! They are intimidating and defensive creatures, that can hold their own!
Egan, what a sweet name! I can’t wait to see little Egan’s journey unfold, he seems so adventurous and optimistic! I can’t wait to see where his adventure takes him!
Great job!
-Madee
Hey, Moriah!
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, I love the layout, theme and little additions on your site! It's obvious that you've put a lot of love into your project and it really shows. Some of my personal highlights:
1. Music -- Pines of Rome hit me right in sweet spot as a horn player and Howl's Moving Castle has a sweet soundtrack. Excellent choices.
2. Photo layout -- it's a small thing, but your offset text and photos on Chapter 1 is gorgeous.
3. All the hedgehog photos -- did you take them yourself? They look great and they add a really fun vibe.
Your writing is also very strong. I love that you aren't afraid to use chunks of dialogue -- it helps avoid the "wall of exposition" feeling that you get in conversation-less stories and simultaneously develops the personalities of your characters by what they say.
You've got an amazing start on this project and I honestly couldn't find anything I'd change -- props to you and your proofreading. I can't wait to read about Egan's next adventures!
Hey Moriah! I really enjoyed visiting your website! It is very well put together and the layout, scheme, and minor details that you add really make the website its own experience, which is really unique! In addition, the writing in your story was really great! The use of dialogue to break up what could be seen as a wall of text really engages the reader and makes it more approachable in that way. The character development is also very, very strong and I really felt a connection for them throughout the story because of what you've done. This is a great start to a fantastic project, and I hope I get to read more of it later! I am also leaving this storybook project knowing a lot more about hedgehogs than I had previously. Great job!
ReplyDeleteMoriah,
ReplyDeleteIt was a delight to go through your blog. Your theme being hedgehogs is absolutely adorable. Having such an endless source of inspiration from hedgehogs of your own is quite the predicament (sarcasm).
Having music on your site is a nice touch. I have done the same, so I can appreciate the small details in have beautiful pieces like that playing as you read! And you are definitely right, art does inspire art. I wish more people would include bits of music that they find pleasing to hear as they read, on their blog; it would be cool to explore musical tastes of our fellow students as well.
Going over your stories, it's evident that you're a great writer. The aesthetic style you have used here is notable. The only thing that I'd recommend experimenting with is the background color of text boxes being white. They just stand out from the rest of the page and draw the readers' attention to its contrast of color. I'm almost certain that this was an intended effect, so this is just me expressing my opinion! Other than that, I think you've done a great job thus far.
Best of luck!
-Lance J.
Hey Moriah!
ReplyDeleteThat was... one interesting introduction. I remember having gerbils when I was younger, which have a lot of the same "unfortunate" habits as hedgehogs, as it would appear.
The first chapter of your story is absolutely heartwarming. The atmosphere you construct with the images, site design, and music combined with the story make for a very kind and lovely story with a strong moral. My only piece of feedback is the ending - it feels somewhat odd to simply have the character speak the moral in plain text, rather than have the listener gather it.
I really liked the symbolism built into your story, both through your characters and the magpie's story. It really aides your moral well, and the odd pairing of the burrowing fellow with the now-flightless bird, both brought the forest floor, make for a great pair in the story. I'm excited to see where the hedgehog will be found next!
Hey Moriah,
ReplyDeleteI had to come back and see what kind of adventures Egan was going to take. It's hard to pass up a story about a hedgehog. I loved reading your elegant writing style. To be honest, I expected a light and cartoon-ish type of story but I was pleasantly surprised by your artistic vision and tasteful construction of the story. I thought that you seamlessly incorporated the story of the magpies and lovers and the original story about the hunting dog. And then paring that narrative with your character Egan really showed your creativity. I will definitely be revisiting your site to read the next adventure.
And I forgot to mention, I wish I had noticed the music you had provided before I had read the whole story. It sounded like it would have certainly enhanced the experience had I listened to it while reading.
DeleteHello, Moriah!
ReplyDeleteI read your introduction a while back, and I remember you including something about a hedgehog. I must say that I am glad to hear that you devoted your project to that lovely animal!
I appreciate how you included a musical piece for us to enjoy while visiting your Storybook! I wonder how long it took you to find the pieces that you thought were most suitable for your project. I read your introduction, and I must say that Egan’s story reminds me quite a bit of The Tale of Despereaux. Except, it seems that Egan is in for a bigger adventure in the outside world.
After reading your first story, I will admit that I am a big fan of Egan! I love his kind heart and his earnest desire to help his forgotten (and quite frankly underappreciated) magpie friend. I love the twist at the end where the other birds are taught a lesson for neglecting their former leader.
I am looking forward to your next story!
Hi Moriah,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your introduction especially with all the facts about hedgehogs. I didn't know how vicious hedgehogs can be, eating their own young!! I really liked the picture of your hedgehog as the banner picture. How adorable! This image will let me connect the story with the main character. Now every story I read, I will imagine your little hedgehog going through these adventures. The first story was very cute. I like how you combine different aspects of what you learned into one story, taking a fable, a movie, and an old legend! The reason why you chose the magpie is very unique! Vietnamese people also have a legend similar to that but with ravens. Who knew I would read a story with that same idea? I wished you put more dialogue in your story. That could be an edit that would make your story more engaging. I feel like you were just "telling" and not showing. Egan is definitely a favorite of mine so far, and those young magpies got what they deserved! Can't wait to read more about these adventures.
Hi Moriah,
ReplyDeleteWell right away I was extremely interested in your storybook. The title of the storybook is spectacular and in such a fun way. Then the look and feel that you have underlined with your theme is eye-catching. I love the photos you have used and the titles too. I think this is a really adorable idea and your stories are going to go far. Keep up the good work!!
Hey Moriah!
ReplyDeleteFirst off I just want to say that I never realized that the hedgehog is such a complicated and weird animal. I’ve always thought they had a normal family dynamic, and never realized that in Greek mythology they are given such a sorted and quite frankly, unsavory existence. Out of curiosity, how did you come to know all of this about hedgehogs?
As far as the layout of your site goes, I found everything pretty easy to access! I like how you don’t just have tabs for your stories, but that you ask people to start with the intro and move through the stories in a linear fashion. I also like how you have the links to the stories and comment wall in multiple places. Keep up the good work! It looks like you are off to a great start and I’m interested to see where it all ends up this semester!
Best,
- JD
Hi Moriah,
ReplyDeleteThe images you have chosen for your project go so well with your background color. I really like the way you designed your website and how your text alternates from the left side to the right. I think Xu Beihong's illustration of a magpie is totally gorgeous and I am really glad you included it. I also like the other animal picture you are using but I think it would be really cool if you found some illustrations of cats similar to the magpie. But that picture of the hedgehog and the eiffel tower is super adorable. Also, it is awesome how you include music with your stories. What a cool idea that really makes you stand out. It definitely adds to the overall experience.
I like your writing. Both of your stories are cute and fun to read. I love Egan! I think cat tricks is my favorite of your two stories, probably because I am a crazy cat lady.
Hi Moriah! I really liked reading your story it was a very nice read. I am in the Indian epics class, so I wasn't even familiar with the original fable about the hunting dog. I didn't really know where the story was going until I got to the end. You masterfully tie the story up. I could definitely see this as a sort of prequel if you will to the original. Moving on, you have a great website layout that is very easy to navigate. Also, I like the youtube video at the bottom of each page. You are going above and beyond to make a good website. The layout you have on your stories is very advanced. Having the pictures draping on either side is great to see. The overall quality of your work is amazing! Thanks for sharing your story with me! I hope to read more in the future!
ReplyDeleteHey Moriah,
ReplyDeleteI love your storybook! I’m delightfully charmed by the little hedgehog Egan; I know you said you’re drawing your inspiration from Aesop and the Wizard of Oz, but I’m also reminded of the Redwall series by Brian Jacques, in which anthropomorphic animals that are “good” must fight against bad guys, while learning lessons along the way. (It was one of my favorite book series as a child.) You’ve got a very flowy writing style which works very well for your stories; it rather reminds me of Homer and his use of metaphors and similes. The use of music as a nice touch as well! If you want your audience to listen to the music while they read your story, I’d suggest placing the video at the beginning of your story, so they can click on it immediately and start reading while it plays. But either way, it’s a nice touch! I’m very curious to see who Egan meets next, and what size it is!
Hey Moriah,
ReplyDeleteI love your story so far! The way you chose to tell tales from the perspective of a hedgehog was a great idea and the tales themselves are creative and captivating. Also, I love the way you have set up your website. The way you staggered the pictures and the text made things more interesting to read than just a huge block of text. Both stories had good morals and the images tied in really well. The magpie pictures in particular were especially lovely. Also, I love how you added a song to listen to while I was reading. I love Howl's Moving Castle! In the second story, I liked how you switched it up a bit. I read the original fable before and it was fun to see the cat take the place of the fox and the hedgehog take the place of the cat!
Great job so far, I'll be back to see how it goes from here.
-Elyse
Hello again, Moriah!
ReplyDeleteWow, I was completely blown away by your first story on this project, the one about the magpie! This is honestly one of my favorite, if not my favorite, stories that I have read so far--I actually felt like crying for the poor magpie and I absolutely love the way you dealt with ageism, something that happens so often and casually in American society. This truly was a gorgeous piece of work and you should be extremely proud of it! It is especialy impressive to me that you drew from multipe stories to craft this--your inspiration shines through in the quality of this writing! I have absolutely no criticism for this piece and am so excited to continue reading your fantastic stories! Little Egan is too cute and the pictures you used to illustrate this story are so incredibly beautiful! Great work and wonderful project, Moriah!
Hey there Moriah,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed your website that you had created for the storybook project for this myth and folklore class. It was very well put together and well thought out with the layout, scheme and some minor details that I noticed while scrolling through such as the titles. You made it very easy for the reader to scroll through and choose a story to read with out struggling to find on they enjoyed. I can tell you spent a lot of time when writing your stories because there was a lot of attention to detail in your stories. It wasn’t just a wall of text; it was broken up for the reader with dialogue. The character development throughout the stories was very good and is once again a lot of attention put into the details of the stories. This is so far such a great project and I will definitely have to look for more later in the semester!
Hey Moriah,
ReplyDeleteI haven't seen your storybook project in a while and it has really progressed A LOT! I am a really big fan of the design and layout because it helps in telling the stories and setting tone and mood without the reader having to even read the stories yet! It is so well done! I also loved your detailed writing style because it makes it so easy for the reader to get lost in the world that you created so elegantly, and I can tell you spent a lot of time on it! I loved your formatting and use of dialogue in your stories, and it made it so seamless to read and appreciate! I can't wait for you to add more stories so I can check back on it! Great job so far!
Hey Moriah, this is my first encounter with your project and first impression: I love it. I think it's super cute you chose to base it off of a hedgehog. The little pictures you have kill me. I think the lay out of your project is great. It is very organized, and as I said before super cute. I think you managed to capture the vibe of your stories perfectly. Onto your stories. You did a really good job of balancing both dialogue and narration. It doesn't feel like one reigns over the other, but they both work together to make the story work. The fact that your building up his life as you go makes the project as a whole a lot more complex. It's like we are seeing Egan mature in front of our eyes and it's very rewarding, and kind of heartwarming. Really good job, Moirah.
ReplyDeleteHi Moriah,
ReplyDeleteWhat a fun and creative story. I love the flow of your entire story. You did a great job easing into the introduction and wrapping up the story in the conclusion. Your sentenced were so descriptive. One of my favorite sentences is when you were describing the tiger, “this creature has a bright orange coat that glowed like fire even under the shadow of nighttime. Its black stripes raced up and down a muscular hide, which rose and fell with every powerful breath.” Another sentence I liked is, “Paws the size of five Egans hid sharpened claws that could easily deliver a fatal would to any animal, as the scratches on the nearby trees stood testament to.” I thought you did an amazing job with the story. Overall, it was very entertaining, descriptive, and an easy read. I look forward to reading more of your stories. Great Job!
Hello again Moriah!
ReplyDeleteAs always, I loved the story I read this week from your storybook--the one about Egan and the cat! I think the lesson in the story is so true--better to have one secure and sure method than thousands of insecure, unsure methods! I did feel so bad for the poor kitty--having two of my own, cats have a special place in my heart, as I am sure hedgehogs have in yours! I personally would love to have a hedgehog some day as they are just too adorable--but that will not be for a while since I have a German Shepherd and two kitties who would all play a bit too rough with such a little pokey ball. Anyway, great job with this story and progressing Egan's adventure--Egan is just the cutest! I also have read the Traveling Cat Chronicles and loved it so much, though the ending just made me too sad... Great work and I look forward to reading the rest of your stories about little Egan!
Moriah,
ReplyDeleteYour stories were absolutely adorable. The theme you carried out throughout your pages was so entertaining and mind-blowing! You really captured my attention the whole time, which does not surprise me as you have always been an incredible writer. I love where your inspiration came from and how you ended on that note. I really appreciated that and think it is so important to understand what you thought of your page. You channeled your passions in one page: music, hedgehogs, and even medicine. I love this intertwining of this and how those kids were your inspiration. Everything was so neatly displayed and the images were so fun to look at amidst the stories. The music you chose for each page was so interactive as well. I am so impressed, Moriah! I really love everything that you did here. I cannot seem to find any advice. It was absolutely perfect! This was so fun to read and I am glad I finally got around to reading this as a whole.
Hey Moriah,
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading your story about Egan and getting the tiger out of the trap. Egan seems like a really innocent character with a good spirit. I was afraid that the tiger was going to betray him like the tiger does the Brahman in some of the stories we read toward the beginning of the semester. Your paragraph spacing seemed great in my opinion. Professor Gibbs always tells me to make a separate paragraph for dialogue, and it appears you’ve done that well. They are not too long, chunky, or choppy, so I don’t think you need to make any real adjustments to them. I think it was especially effective how you decided to italicize Egan’s quotes versus not italicizing the tiger’s comments. It made it really easy to differentiate who was talking at different times. I’m looking forward to coming back for your final story!
Good luck,
Brady